Old timey film review: The Animal Kingdom

I'm a fan of Myrna Loy, it's on YouTube, what's not to love?

Well, this is pre-Thin Man Myrna Loy, and Hollywood still had no idea what to do with her. Here she's the bitch who makes Leslie Howard ditch all his friends within 15 minutes of their engagement. She also puts her nose in his business dealings.

Leslie Howard puts up with her and you just want to slap him. Ann Harding is the long-suffering former gal pal/ friend with benefits, who tries to stay noble while being shut out. The only other film I saw her in was "Double Harness." Good actress, but she played a martyr there, also.

It's all very talky, and stagy and you just know it was based on a drawing-room drama that might have been controversial in the day, but now it's kind of dreary and dated. And all the characters talk like they're in a drawing room drama from the '30s.

The negligees are skimpy and again I'm amazed that the negligees are wasted on really flat-chested women. Did bigger boobs evolve over the past 80 years, or is it Hollywood today won't cast you unless you wear a DD cup?

Review: Thin Man TV series

The boxed set of the "Thin Man" films contains an episode of the late '50s TV version with Peter Lawford and Phyllis Kirk playing Nick and Nora Charles. Based on that and the clips available on YouTube, here's some thoughts.

Bad:

Too short: If we learned anything from Jessica Fletcher, it's that you need an hour to make a proper whodunnit. Columbo only had one suspect and his show was two hours! This show would have a half dozen suspects all crammed into 30 minutes. Let's get to know these people.

Phyllis Kirk: She wasn't playing Myrna Loy, she was playing Lucy Ricardo, and it sucked. In the book and films Nora didn't know about detective work, but no way was she stupid. She knew her way around men, the city and its bars. She was fascinated by Nick's past life as a detective and always wanted to know more. The TV show portrayed her as a half-wit accidentally handcuffing herself, or getting entangled in police tape, always reliant on Nick to bail her out. Dreadful!

Greenwich Village: Why in the world would this rich couple live in a tiny apartment in Greenwich Village? Their home base was San Francisco, among high society. This is what made the contrast with Nick's rough-and-tumble past so enjoyable.

Good:

Peter Lawford as Nick. He didn't take the subtle comic approach of William Powell, but he made up for it with cool. There's a scene in the episode in the box set where he's interviewing a suspect and half way through the interview he takes out, and lights up a cigarette. You could tell this wasn't in the script, Peter Lawford just needed a cigarette at that moment.

With Lawford's super cool and good looks, an hour length, a San Francisco setting, and a better Nora (Julie Newmar springs to mind), instead of being a forgotten footnote to Thin Man lore, this could have been a series that ran in reruns well into the 60s and 70s.

An update:

The antenna station GetTV has been showing all of the episodes of this show lately, and having seen several more episodes, I can't say my review of the one episode was wrong in anyway. I still stand by my critique.

The only change I would make is: I was too easy on Phyllis Kirk. She's terrible, and every episode made me hate her more. The actress has passed away now, so I can safely say: She was scary looking! And she applied her lipstick with a paint roller. And she had no charm. It's so hard for me to believe they couldn't find an attractive 25 year old on the Broadway stage who could act. Phyllis Kirk was the best they could do? Crazy.

No "Thin Man" remake?

It's been reported that after the disappointing returns on "Dark Shadows," Warner Bros. will not be remaking "The Thin Man" with Johnny Depp.

I'm of mixed emotions. One on hand, it's a classic! Hollywood shouldn't remake classics! On the other hand, the film is 80 years old! Perhaps the statute of limitations has run out and it's time to see what modern Hollywood can bring to the classic. (Color for starters, then Johnny Depp).

We haven't heard the end of this though. It's too good a property to leave alone, and, let's face it,   it's the only film Hollywood hasn't remade  yet.

But who....George Clooney and Rachel Weisz?